officially married

so saturday was the big day. FINALLY! i noticed myself that i have calmed down, im not snapping at anyone at all, other than madison who tends to push my buttons when im tired. it was a great day all in all. at 8 in the morning my maid of honor and i did a no rain dance. it cleared up and the sun came out in time for the ceremony, then it rained while we ate, cleared up for us to have our dance, rained, cleared up for us to cut the cake, rained, cleared up for us to take the quads to go change, and rained the rest of the afternoon. its amazing that it stopped when we had things to do. then rained after we did what we needed to do. we KNOW my mom was there in spirit, EVERYONE felt it. my aunt who was marrying us called me by my moms name which happens to be my middle name, i corrected her by loudly whispering "my name is becky, not susan" then she asked if she had called me susan and i said "yes" she apologized and was going to redo the parts she called me susan, but i said "just  keep going" lol. i had my hair in a french braid with little flowers and ribbon intertwined in my braid. brian had gotten sweat in his eyes, and everyone thought he was crying. i didnt cry. but thats because my bridesmaids and maid of honor were making me laugh. we brought the suits that were rented back yesterday, and brians so it can be cleaned. and yes i was a smart ass with the cake, i threw a piece at brian and got him AND my dad, so my dad threw some at me and got my dress...hahahaha....it really was a fun day. i really thought i was going to cry but im really surprised i didnt. i think its because i KNEW my mom was there in spirit. my grandpa, aunt, brother and other mom (two of the groomsmens mom) were there in spirit as well. since theyve all passed away. the rehearsal was pretty funny too. then again i was half blitzed on rum and coke, and my aunts dog was jumping at the plum tree trying to get a stick which he is no longer allowed to have because he had an accident last month where a stick got stuck in his throat so he had to have emergency surgery. we got married under that tree, which when i was a kid was my favorite climbing tree. when my aunt asked if anyone objected to us being married, she also added "my brother wanted me to say that if anyone objects he will get the shotgun" NOONE objected. LMAO. her brother is my dad. at the very last minute my back up photographer and ringbearer didnt show (turns out they were both sick) so we had one of my bridesmaids son be the ringbearer and since i have two digital cams, my cousin in law used one and my uncle used the other. the pictures came out great.

single digits now

we are now down to 9 days til the big day. im a ball of nerves. i lashed out at brian last night because i was so tired. i got up at 330 yesterday morning and had no nap at all, which makes for a very grumpy becky. i tried to get maddy down for her afternoon nap but she wasnt having it so she was whiney. we argued for a little bit, and i feel bad, but he knows if i dont get much sleep i get grumpy. everyone else in the house gets to sleep but me. i was asleep by 930 last night, which is unusual for me because if im that exhausted im usually out by 8. but i couldnt because madison wasnt sleeping by then and he was playing on the computer, which irritated me. i think once the wedding is done and over with ill be not so pissy. its mostly my nerves that drive my tude lately, and i know he doesnt like it, but i stress about way too much way too fast, but thats just how i am. i try to not let the stress get to me, but i cant help it. it doesnt seem like hes stressing much about it. i need to find a way out to whorles to pick up two picnic packs of meat...it contains hot dogs, hamburgs and sausage patties, which i will get sweet sausage. i dont like hot sausage, it irritates my stomach. mack is going to NYC tomorrow with my dad, my uncle, my cousin, my aunt and my gram til sunday. tomorrow will be the first night it will be just me and maddy all night. great, make my anxiety even worse. theres usually someone else in the house with us, but tomorrow night brian has to work and everyone else is going to NYC. i mean i know she will do fine, but my anxiety tends to make me worry about things which tends to make me NOT sleep. im thinking ill let mack take my NEW camera so she can take pics. ill even send a couple extra batteries. WTH heartburn from strawberries? WTF. thats new. lol...i just hiccuped and it tasted like strawberries. its been so peaceful since his mother hasnt called in get this 3 weeks. and if she has called i dont remember...lol. today its going to be tuna fish and chips for lunch, no clue about dinner. suppose i could take something out. since i went grocery shopping the other day, but its hot out and i dont want to turn the oven on. so maybe we will have egg salad for dinner. not sure. that would require me walking my fat ass to the store to get a jar of mayo. forgot it the other when i went shopping and i looked right at it. we only use hellmanns because thats what i was raised on and i like it better than anything else. meh, ill wake him up in a little bit and make him go...im good like that. just cuz i have so much to do here. like more flippin laundry. and its not even mine. oh well

10 days

holy crap, in ten days ill officially be married. where the heck has that year gone? i feel like ive been planning this thing by myself, though i know i havent. the only major things we need to get paid off are the cake and getting flowers. i have a cake person who is going to put real flowers on the cake along with the topper i picked. simple things. the flowers im just getting from the grocery store. the tent and tables are coming from a guy brian usually works with in the summer, and he said we dont have to pay him all at once and we can make payments when we can, hes really cool about it. im so exhausted, i dont sleep all that great, and dont get to take naps because no one will leave me alone! i tried to relax yesterday and all i heard was bickering between brian and mack and he kept sending the girls up to me. i dont bother him when he sleeps (except today because he said he wanted to go drop his tux off to get cleaned) like 45 mins ago. haha, you see what weve done, NOTHING. hes still sleeping. he hates when people mess with his ears, so what do i do to annoy him? mess with his ears. because its FUNNY! he messes with my ears, whats the difference? i hate when people mess with my ears or feet. i hate when people touch my feet, i hate anything on my feet. i dont like socks or shoes and only wear them if i have to. oh and bras too, i hate them. again only wear them if i have to. usually if im going out downtown, i dont bother because it will annoy the crap out of me. but if im going to someones house then i will. this past sunday brian and i practiced our vows with my aunt whos marrying us. and the part where i THOUGHT i might cry, i did. i didnt cry during the exchanging of the pretend rings, but rather the "til death do us part" part. because my mom wont be there. and i know she would be proud of me. so it wasnt sad tears it was more of happy tears if you want to call them that. crap, i still have to make some more table decorations and do a few more things for that. need to find the basket mack used in a wedding as flower girl for maddy. so she can use it.